Pretty much all I’ve been able to think about this week is Nathan Fielder’s new Elizabeth Holmes documentary You Can See Everything, and now, praise God, I have very much seen it with my own eyes.
My primary takeaway from this bizarre three-hour masterpiece is that human beings are fascinating in their heartrending fallibility and infinite ego… but I also recorded (quite literally) every thought I had while watching the documentary. Read them all below, but be warned: spoilers ahead.
- Liz!
- THE Liz!
- God, I can already tell this husband sucks because he just used the words “radical transparency” in reference to his and Elizabeth Holmes’s participation in a Nathan Fielder documentary.
- There she is, folks.
- I am already bummed out by the presence of these kids in this movie.
- I need to rewatch Amanda Seyfried as Holmes, stat.
- Nathan!!!!!
- I was just weird to him at a party!
- I don’t think he noticed, though.
- Wow, Theranos was really billed as “the iPod of healthcare,” huh.
- The cut between the description of Holmes’s fraud and her reading to her baby…wild.
- In fact, this is all…simply wild.
- Sorry, I don’t have a better word for it than that!
- As of yet, anyway.
- Damn, haven’t heard the name “Sunny Balwani” in a while.
- Holmes didn’t speak publicly for seven years?
- I would love to be in a position to offer Nathan Fielder a bagel.
- LOL, the “Holmes denying she committed a crime” section of this movie has begun.
- Get her, Nathan!
- “All I know is my truth” —the most manipulative person you’ve ever met.
- Sorry if I sound heartless about Holmes being forced to leave her family for prison, but that sadly happens to a lot of moms, most of them without Holmes’s resources or history of large-scale fraud.
- Nobody says “wow” quite like Nathan Fielder.
- This man is so insane.
- Holmes’s husband, to be clear, not Fielder.
- Billy Evans (the husband) meeting and falling in love with Holmes post-downfall is either romantic or terrifying, and I’m not sure which.
- “Yeah, I like women.” Sure.
- I want to go to the Nathan Fielder school of investigative journalism.
- Wait, Evans did worry Holmes was scamming him?
- Obsessed with him trying to plead down the family-wealth allegations.
- Just sit with it, diva!
- God, the lighting of Holmes is (say it with me) wild.
- Not this frontal shot of Evans at the gym!
- “So who messed up, then, in this process?”
- Exactly, Nathan.
- God, the learned helplessness radiating from Holmes is crazy.
- These recorded side convos between Holmes and Evans…
- WHY WOULD YOU LET NATHAN FIELDER INTO YOUR HOME 24/7?
- “Liz, what? You’ve never lied in your life?”
- Oscar for Nathan Fielder, immediately.
- Bummed out once again at how cute this baby is.
- Fielder continually just stating the facts of Holmes’s deception and watching her lie to him about it is breaking my brain.
- “So this is the famous scam device.” LOL.
- “Well, why choose those words?”
- We are really getting down to semiotics here, and I’m into it.
- Lot of debate about what a lie is!
- “Say what’s there” is advice a lot of people could use.
- Okay, so Holmes and Evans are definitively not classic-comedy fans.
- Fielder playing “Who’s on First?” for Holmes while she holds her baby is making me short-circuit.
- Ah, the dulcet tones of men explaining comedy.
- Then again, I guess Nathan Fielder is very qualified.
- “I trust Billy, and Elizabeth is a lot wiser.”
- Okay, I guess we are just saying anything!
- I am so claustrophobic in this theater right now.
- Yay, Amanda Seyfried!
- God, she really ate that role.
- The Curse mentioned (sort of.)
- God, these people are insane.
- Do not let Elizabeth Holmes have a laser!!!
- Is Fielder going to frustration-cry?
- I would fully understand and support it if he did.
- “I’m always being real.”
- AHHHHHHH!
- “Sometimes I joke”…
- Aw, Nathan.
- Dude, I’m sad.
- I mean, Holmes should face consequences for her actions, but I’m still sad.
- Holmes/Evans + AI = 🙁
- Sorry, was that…a loose gecko?
- Evans talking about Holmes’s body is giving “yuck,” to me.
- Oh shit, why does Evans want to turn off the cameras?
- The dynamic evolving between Evans and Fielder is making me want to bite my nails, which I haven’t done in years.
- “Building monuments of love to me”….oh, I’m scared of Evans.
- Not the “Elizabeth Holmes Innocent” billboards in LA!
- I’ve seen these!
- Fielder trying to get Evans to face reality is even more insane than Fielder trying to get Holmes to face reality.
- How is Holmes potentially less crazy than her husband?
- Is that…
- Actual Amanda Seyfried?
- Reviewing Fielder’s footage with him?
- Footage of herself playing Holmes?
- And Holmes sobbing?
- I am astral projecting.
- Seyfried is right, it’s heartbreaking!
- And she also describes it as “wild.” Twins!
- “She literally could just be crazy.”
- Well, yes!
- I’m so glad Seyfried also wants Holmes and Evans to break up.
- And she correctly identified Evans as controlling!
- Someone in the audience of my screening just said “That’s true.”
- “Do you miss her?”
- Seyfried bringing the documentarian heat right back to Fielder!
- CHRISTOPHER ABBOTT?
- Bro, this is all very Kate Plays Christine.
- In a good way!
- Seyfried doing Holmes voice is so crazy.
- “That’s not a real documentary.” LOL.
- “There was, like, several pizzas there” also made me LOL.
- The levels of scammer-off here are truly insane.
- Not to mention the manipulation meter! Off the charts!
- It’s fucking insane that Holmes could appear innocent to anyone at this point, but also…
- I mean, she’s categorically not innocent, but is she innocent of trying to get a payday out of this documentary?
- WILL WE EVER CRACK THIS CASE?
- I am quite literally gnawing my sleeve to keep from biting my nails.
- Gross, but better than breaking my no-nail-biting streak, right?
- This call from Holmes to Evans and her kids where she’s just desperately trying to tell them how much she loves them…
- I’m tearing up! I admit it!
- Or did she know Seyfried was going to be there?
- And if so, am I an absolute mark for being moved?
- “Is she talking about biotech?” LOL.
- EVANS IS FUCKING INSANE!
- I AM NOT OKAY!
- HE USED POWER OF ATTORNEY TO GET HOLMES’S X LOGIN?
- “I can literally do anything”????????????????
- I’m glad Seyfried seems as appalled as I feel right now.
- Now we’re bringing Charlie Kirk into it?
- Of course Evans is a Kirkhead.
- Seyfried calling Kirk a “fucking pussy” is so awesome.
- I am spiraling.
- Evans has a gun on him at all times?
- Is Nathan Fielder safe??!?!?!??!?
- “I’m practical”?
- I feel absolutely insane right now, so I can’t imagine how Fielder must be feeling.
- Obsessed with Fielder’s chic little glass of red wine.
- Breakup?!?
- Is she going to call him on the appointed day??????
- Ugh, no, it’s fucking Evans.
- Evans controlling Fielder’s access to Holmes is INSANE.
- I need to lie down!
- Wow, this haunting shot of the phone not ringing!
- Oop, now it’s ringing.
- This is some of the most affecting dialogue-free footage I’ve seen since…that silent underwater episode of Bojack Horseman, I guess?
- Okay, yay, we’re recreating it with Seyfried.
- I’m so uncomfortable.
- And that’s the intended effect of a Nathan Fielder joint, I suppose!
- Horses?
- What the hell, sure.
- The meta levels here (Seyfried playing Holmes complaining about Seyfried’s portrayal of her) may kill me.
- “Are you even aware of the decisions he’s making on your behalf?”
- The million-dollar question!
- Seyfried reading Fielder for falling for Holmes’s besotted bullshit re: Evans is so satisfying.
- “I think the love is, like, real.”
- HM.
- I mean, what is love, I suppose?
- I feel like my brain is being put through a very slow but high-powered blender.
- Is Fielder being too protective of Holmes?
- I’m starting to lose track of which shots are Holmes and which shots are Seyfried playing Holmes.
- “It’s very complicated.”
- You said it, sister.
- I am lowkey questioning the meanings of certain very familiar words (”love,” “truth,” “lie,” “believe”) as a direct result of this film.
- Which is to say…hats off, Fielder.
